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Full
Throttle Well, this ends the July page of this blog. At one time, I didn't have much to write about at all, but now, the flood gates are open, and each month I blog more and more. How cool is that?! I can't believe a few short months ago, I wasn't writing or drawing. Now, it's almost a drug that I need. G
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My car is still in the shop, I should have it back tomorrow or Thursday. I've been without a car for over 2 weeks now, borrowing Mom and Dad's. Even though they've been totally great with letting use it, I feel obligated not to put too many miles on it, basically other than to and from work. I feel a bit stranded by my own doing, and haven't been to my drawing class since the drawing on the bottom of this page. I'm jonesin' to be drawing again. It's so cool that I need to do my art again. I picked up the Daredevil and Sex & The City Season 2 DVDs tonight. I'm not sure if Daredevil was a good movie or not. I know at the time, I was pretty blown away by it, even though my common sense kept screaming at me "Dude, this sucks!" Maybe it's just the comic book geek in me happy that it's not Hulk. This is second Sex & The City DVD set. I know it's perceived to be chick tv, but as a single person, I can relate to it on a lot of levels as well. I always joke that if they made a series out of my life, they'd have to call it No Sex & The Country. I'm going sailing again tomorrow night. Jamie, from work, asked me to be part of his race crew for the next 5 weeks. I've sailed with him a few times before, and it's awesome. The boats are flying scotts, which are pretty small sailing boats. It's an amazing thing, being at the complete mercy of the wind, and then racing under that mercy as well. Last week, we took two seconds out of 13 boats, so that's really cool. Once I saw all those boats behind us, and realized that we were close to coming in first, my competitive spirit kicked in. I didn't know I even had that spirit. There's something completely serene about being on the water. I'm sure there'll be more to come where the sailing's concerened. Is it me, or is The Scientist by Coldplay the coolest song out right now? I got a message from Vicki tonight. She wants me to be her date next month for her sister's wedding. It should be cool, but I wonder if some of the old group that I've walked away from will be there? I'm a little nervous about that, but I'll do it for Vick. Also, it sounds like she's raised over 3 grand for her AIDSRide. That is so commendable. Has anybody noticed all of the spiders and webs in my artwork? What's up with that? Tell me your theories. That's all for now. Nothing to major or too deep going on. Just going through life, watching it go by and trying to experience it as well. Later. G
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Arthur
2: On The Rocks
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Chumani
Tutanka Obwachi
Over my 4th of July vacation, I picked up the DVD for Dances With Wolves. Back when I was in college, this was my favorite movie, but I haven't watched it in years. The version I bought on DVD is the director's cut - almost 4 hours long. I finally got to watch the majority of it last Saturday night when I was babysitting my nephews. I finished watching the movie and all the extras over the course of the week. I have to admit, I forgot how amazing the movie is, and why I considered it one of my favorites. To me, the movie is about one man's journey through life, finding out who he really is. He meets some incredible people and goes through an incredible transformation, finding out who his true self really is. The movie has a genuine warmth about it, a real poetic quality to it. The score to this film is one of my favorites, only second to the Star Wars music. I think there's something special about the fact that it takes 4 hours to really develop these characters, and make you feel like your really part of the journey. The landscapes and sunsets are just brilliant and makes me realize there was a time in movies that I could be wowed with something other than splashy special effects. After finishing this movie, I forgot how the film got under my skin and really changed me, changed how I saw life. Back in 1990, this movie was about my time in college, my journey as an artist. It's only fitting that I rediscover this film now. What a brilliant piece of work. A weird coincidence happened with this movie now..... One of the actors towards the end of it plays an American soldiers. The actor's name is Tony Pierce which is also the name of a fellow blogger who's site I've checked out many times in the past few weeks. I have noticed in my life that once I start looking at things from a different perspective, start analyzing things, and really open myself to new thoughts, people, and ideas, that things like coincidence and deja vu happen all the time. It's as if there's a collective human experience happening out there, and I'm much more taped into it. Am I the only one who this happens to? G
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Our discussions while she cuts my hair is always interesting, always quite fulfilling actually. She has a interesting perspective on life, one that is quite different than the typical American perspective I normally get. When we chat, the conversations don't seem like the normal mindless chatter that one has when one gets their hair cut or teeth cleaned. There's some actual substance to them. It's rare that you find people like that to talk to. I told her about some things that are going on in my life and about this site. She told me that she can tell from the 8 or 9 times that she's cut my hair, that I'm a very open person, that I'm "real" as she put it, that I wear my heart on my sleeve and really not into playing games with people. She said she can tell that I was raised with a strong set of morals and that they affect how I approach things now. It's interesting that she described me like that, since I've been told that before by many friends many times before. I'm kind of the quiet guy who doesn't make the big splash, but makes an impression based more on honesty and by what I have to say, not how loud I say it. She can tell this by what we do talk about: art, religion, relationships, etc. I find it very cool that some people are so in tune with others, and can read them like a book. It's amazing to me, how getting my haircut can be such a cool thing, and that I can manage to take something from such a mundane experience like that. It's good to know that something I take pride in about myself is noticed by others. G P.S. Is anybody out there? Are you reading this? What do you think? Am I just full of shit? Let me know if you read this site! I'm interested to see what kind of audience actually I have with this thing. If I personally don't know you, drop me a line to say what's up. Tell me where you're from, what you do, other cool blog sites you've been to. For now, though, your comments will have to be in email form.
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Hulk
Smash/Bomb? Got home early from work tonight. Skipped out on my workout. Just too fried. Caught "The Incredible Hulk" tv show starring Bill Bixby on the Sci-Fi channel. Sure, when he changed into Lou Ferrigno, it still looked pretty cheesy, but I can understand why it scared the living shit out of me as a kid. There's something really scary about a green weight lifter with a bad wig and a rubber forehead on. I bet the nightmares will come back after all those years. I was so disappointed with the movie. It sucked ass so bad. The Hulk looked amazingly cartoony...unbelievable. I think the only reason the critics didn't tear it apart more was because Ang Lee was the director. That's all for now. It's amazing how one day, inspiration comes barreling up to the surface, and on other days, I don't even have the energy to think about it. G
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I moved here in the early spring of 2000. All that crap with my old group of friends (another reoccurring topic) seemed to be coming to an end. I felt as if I was putting my life back together. My sister and her husband used to live in the place I live now. It's a cheap little lower apartment to an old house, that I feel has a small charm to it. When they moved out, I was stuck in a lease in my apartment in Appleton. In the early spring of 00, my sister found out that this place was going to be up for rent again, and I was no longer in a lease. For me, moving to Wrightstown was the the last thing I had to do, to really start over with things. All I had left in Appleton (not including my job) was an old group of friends that I wanted nothing to do with anymore. The drive wasn't much longer to work, and I decided it was what I needed to make that clean break. Never in a million years, did I imagine that I'd be living back in this town, the place where I went to high school, the place I went to Catholic school. My old grade school is mere feet away from my place. The church that I used to be an alter boy at is across the street. I hear the church bells ring all the time. I never thought I'd be part of smalltown USA again. Hell, I live on Main Street even. How much more small-town does it get? I often tell people that you never know where you're gonna end up in life. When I moved here, Derick was only a month or two old. They live less than a mile away from me. My parents house, where I grew up, is maybe 3 miles away. My brother, Chad, is also less than a mile away. I think at that time, it felt like all I had left was my family. That was part of the real charm for me moving back. Being able to see Derick as often as I wanted became such an important, amazing thing to me. So many times, I will run over there, just to say a quick hello, see how my godson is growing up. Many times, they will just stop over too, just so Derick can see his "Uncle Punkin." Now with Derick growing up so fast it seems, and having Brett in the picture, it just makes me realize how lucky I am to be such an important part in their lives. Last night as I babysitting, hearing them both giggle hysterically as they were jumping all over me, I swelled up with tears, felt so wonderful, so complete. I think back to when Derick was just months old, and when I'd stop over there and he'd be walking for the first time, or smiling at me, or dancing to music. That time seemed so magical back then. Those memories I cherish forever. That time already seems so long ago, it seemed so fresh back then, so brand new. When I look at my life now though, and how the times with Derick and Brett almost seem to get richer and richer, it just boggles my mind, brings me to tears, makes me understand what true love really is all about. Sometimes, it makes me a bit sad for how fast they are growing up, but that's okay. I think of how many good times we have ahead of ourselves. How much love there is left to give. So, yeah, I live on Main Street in Smalltown USA. Many people turn their noses up at that, act like I'm living in the back woods with no electricity, cable, or internet. Perhaps my moving back here, was something I needed to do...needed to be. Right now, the most important thing in my life is being Uncle Punkin, and if that means being part of this small Midwest town, so be it. U.P.
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Gimme
Fuel Gimme Fire Our conversation about blogs was about what is private and what is public, what to share with the web community, and what's better to to not post to the world (a topic that's been buzzing in my head all week). From what I've seen, mine is very personal...very open....but that's what I've made a commitment to do. I talked with her about how I'm slowly involving names in my site of the people in my life, the cast of characters, if you will. I mentioned this in a phone call with Splash tonight, too, that it's interesting for me to see that so many of the conversations that I have with my closest friends end up as subjects or drawings in this journal. I've got a handful of friends who I somehow am always able to have really deep, meaningful discussions with. People like Vicki and Heather, Splash, Brandon, and Mark all fuel my brain, fuel this site. When our conversations end, the topics only begin to percolate in my head. Without those people, there'd be no Ink in the well of G-Man. G
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With the boom of reality shows, I have to admit, I was hooked by some. I remember watching a couple episodes of Fear Factor amazed what people would do for money. Now that show turns my stomach. I remember watching Temptation Island, knowing what a cheap thrill it was, but being hooked on it from the beginning. I kept thinking. "Who are these people??" Could anybody possibly air so much dirty laundry in front of the world? Could anybody possibly cheat on their loved-ones with a camera guy and a sound guy following them around? The shows only seemed to get worse and worse. As the premises get thinner and thinner, the people on these shows seem to appear more and more desperate for fame and recognition (Anna Nicole anyone??). It's as if in this new millinium, people want to be famous merely for the fact that they were on tv...not even because they have any talents or anything interesting to say or add to the world...merely for the the fact that they were on tv. With that holier-than-though speech out of the way, I have to admit, that the last of the reality shows that I still hold on an interest of (other than The Osbournes, I suppose, and I guess even Trading Spaces) is Big Brother. The American version of that show is currently in it's 4th season. I loved the idea of living your life under a microscope and watching all of the inter-personal relationship develop and clash. There was something really cool to me about the first season. They seemed to cast a lot of ordinary, but interesting characters. They all seemed really nice. They seemed like people I'd want to hang out with, people that would be my friends or family. Apparently, nice doesn't get the ratings. The following season, they reformatted the show, added some evil twists to it that pitted the housemates even more against each other. The most evil of that group, Will, won the $500,000. Everybody knew he was evil, but admitted that he "played the game the best." Well, this season just started, and it seems like the cast is getting younger and less ordinary looking each year. Everybody now, with the exception of one older guy, is part of the elite beautiful people of the world. I bet there's maybe one person on that show who's not in his or her 20s. Last night, two people hooked up. Had sex. They showed enough that there was no doubt in my mind that he gave her his big brother. It was shot in that voyeuristic "night-cam" green look that doesn't even allow privacy in the dark. It blew my mind that they were showing this on tv. HBO? Yes. But not CBS. Isn't CBS the home of Matlock and Murder, She Wrote? When they got done having sex, the guy rolled off the girl, they both laughed, and he said. "I wonder what my Grandma's gonna think." Ewww. (After having sex, I think it's a requirement that you don't think about your parents or grandparents for at least one week!) What blew my mind even more than showing them having the sex, was that the dude voted for the chick to be kicked out of the house last night. Unfuckin' believable!! He fucked her in more way than one I guess. Like I said before: Where do they get these people?!?!?! I tend to forget that we live in a world where shame no longer exists. It's no longer about what you say, but how loud you say it. I question where they find people like that, then I realize that there are thousands of people who'd do porn for a quick buck...not caring what Grandma thinks. It's easy to completely fault the people on these shows; we have a mentality in this country that our souls are on sale to the highest bidder. I think we also have to blame the scummy people who come up with these shows, dangle the million bucks in our faces...if you only eat this one bug. I had a 4:00 a.m. debate with some of my friends earlier this summer about this type of thing, about what our price is, what we'd do for a million bucks. I brought up that one of the most disgusting things I've heard that people did on Fear Factor was carry around huge dead rats with their mouths. I said there's no way I'd ever do anything like that. There's no price so great to degrade myself like that. My friends called me on it, said I was full of shit. For a million bucks, they proposed, look at all the good I could bring to the world? Look at the difference I could make in Brett and Derick's lives. With that, they had me. When you think of all the starving people you could feed, all the acres of rain forest you could save, or all the research for cancer or AIDS you could make possible with that money, it's hard to turn it down. I guess everybody does has their price. I guess what really bothers me, is that we live in a world that exploits people with temptations that are so difficult to turn down. Yeah, drinking cow blood is disgusting, but think of the good I could do for the church. Yeah, eating this maggot pizza is pretty nasty, but I could pay for the college of my nephews and all my cousins. I could help my cousin Rachel through medical school. Wouldn't that ultimately make the world a better place? I feel like the human spirit is so fragile, and it's being beaten down by corporate American every day with offers we can't refuse. But yet, if nobody's watching, they wouldn't be making these shows. Look how long Jerry Springer's been on the air. Somebody's watching. I watch it from time to time. It's hard to look away from a train wreck. Where does this circle of human degradation end? What will it take to get back on track as a people, and get our dignity back? It's easy to take the high ground with this, and for as disgusted as I was with Big Brother last night, that won't stop me from watching it again on Friday. What will happen with this world? I know one thing: I'll be watching. G P.S. The above sketch had nothing to do with reality tv when I drew it 10 years ago, but it is about temptation. Back then it had to do with Long Island Ice Teas and my roommate's girlfriend. Today it's about having sex on tv. The more things change, the more they stay the same. :)
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When I was younger and kept a journal, I would write about anybody or anything. If somebody pissed me off, I'd write about it and vent. Now, I feel like I'm censoring myself a bit, because I know I have an audience. It's hard enough for me to be open with the things I talk about in this site, but where do I draw the line? What should I keep to myself? I have to admit, I find keeping up this site extremely cathartic. It is a weird thing, having all of these thoughts, all of these emotions right out in the open. After all, aren't some things private? Am I a victim of the world of reality tv, where the only thing worse than the exhibitionists who expose themselves for the world to see are the voyeurs who can't get enough? When I was younger, I always thought it would be cool to be on the Real World. Now, I've outgrown that demographic, but would love to be on Big Brother. Is this site my response to all that? I always wondered if I was on one of those shows, what could I contribute that was interesting and unique? Yet, here I am, updating this website at least 3 times a week with little things that add to be my life. I honestly believe, that when you probe a little into anybody's life, they have something important to say or something interesting going on. That's probably why reality tv has become so big. My point tonight, though, is that I'm going to post a sketch, but without a real explanation of what it currently has to do with my life. I've decided that once in awhile, some things are still private, and I'd rather not share them with the world, or at least the small audience who checks out this website. I suppose at times, it's alright to keep my heart under my sleeve. Some of you know what this about, others of you can speculate or ask. Moving on....last week, I had a pretty shitty week. It seemed to be capped off by the whole bird scenario, and the feeling that nobody would help me out. It's horrible, feeling alone in the world like that. I also mentioned how my car was acting up on me. Well, my car took a turn for the worse, and it needs some more work. It's definitely time for a new vehicle, but I was hoping to squeeze one more year out of it, which would allow me to get my student loans paid off. Anyway, I mentioned to one of the guys at work about what was going on with it, and he and another guy offered to help me out. They're going to totally go out of their way, spend a lot of time helping me out, getting the Beretta back on the streets. Life is funny. Four days ago, I felt like nobody in the world would help me out, this week, people are going out of there way to help me...almost insisting of it. Karma has a funny way of kicking you in the ass. I had a my review today at work. For as crappy as my work week was last week, my review was nothing but good things; the best review I've had yet to date. All the stuff that had been bothering me seems to have been lifted away with all the positive comments from the review. A pat on the back can go a long way. A good review goes even further. It's as if life gets me down and then eventually, it gives me that needed boost to rejuvenate and get back on track. Like I said, karma has a funny way of kicking you in the ass and telling you to snap out of it. G
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For
The Fans G
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Thursday night, when I got home from work, I could hear this loud chirping in my computer room. A bird got in my house, more specifically, in the heater, and I fought for about 2 or 3 hours to get that problem dealt with. It sounds pretty funny now, but at the time, I really didn't have much of a sense of humor about it. The little thing must have fallen in down from the chimney, and somehow got stuck in the heater. He was scared shitless, and it took quite some time taking the heater apart, and getting a hold of the little guy so he could be put outside. I asked my upstairs neighbor for some help, and she totally helped me out. We ended up using a spaghetti spoon to pull the bird out, grab him, and set him out the window. My neighbor, Dawn, was really cool about it, and helped me laugh about it as it was happening It was so frustrating, as everybody I called, had no help to give me. My dad said to call my landlord. The landlord told me to call a heating and cooling place. All four of the heating and cooling places offered me no help either. Nobody would come over and take the heater apart. So eventually I said "fuck it, I'll do it myself." It sucks when you feel helpless, have no idea what to do, and nobody is willing to help. My neighbor was a godsend that night. It was a shitty way to end a shitty week. One good thing that happened this week, was that I watched the DVD "The Gangs of New York." What an amazing movie! Everything from the scenery to the camera work, the acting and the story was just brilliant. I'm slightly Irish, from what I can get from my family tree. Something like 5 or 10 percent, I think. That movie made me look at that part of my heritage differently. I guess I never fully realized the struggle that the Irish immigrants had when they came to the US. The above sketch, was actually posted for a different reason, which I'll get to in a moment, but it seems to fit in an odd way with how I felt about that movie and how it related to my ancestors. I felt a connection with a small part of my past, which I've never had before, not even when I was in Ireland last summer. The song by U2, "The Hands That Built America," has an even deeper meaning to me now. As time goes on, U2 only gets into my psyche deeper and deeper, as if they're singing to me. The real reason I posted the sketch above, was in response to a chat I had with Heather the night of my last post. I'm not sure what we were talking about, but September 11 came up. I commented that it's something that I still seem to think about often. It seems to pop into my head every couple days, for many different reasons, a song that reminds me of that time, a person's name, just a general feeling, a deja vu....It's one of those things that will be with most of us forever. One of those things we'll be telling our grandchildren about. It will be ancient history to Derick and Brett by the time they can understand. They'll never know of a world before this time, before the innocence was lost. Talking about 9/11 brought up the recent war and what's going on in Iraq. Both Heather and I seem to be against the war, but understand how complex the situation is. Living in the Green Bay area, I've noticed a real negativity towards any type of anti-war thinking. At work, I almost feel like people think I'm anti-American if I share my views, which seem to be quite different from the majority. It's pretty much the same with my family. It's to the point, that I don't even bring up the war in those circles. It's quite frustrating. I feel like the media has gotten extremely conservative during this war, and we're only being shown things the government wants us to see....But I'll get off my soap box, that's not what this is about. When I was in Madison a couple weeks ago, everybody I was around was liberal, and against the war and George Bush. It's amazing how different the attitude is, just being in a different location. The original reason I drew this sketch was because I had two friends who were sent over to Saudi Arabia after that war happened all those years ago. The drawing was just my way of showing how I was afraid for my friends, how I missed them, and how my heart was with them. It's interesting though, because it really represents my confused relationship with my country, with patriotism, and with the freedoms we have. Dad was in Viet Nam, and never talks about it. I sometimes wonder how much that experience changed him, made him who he is today. I can't even imagine what he went through over there. I wonder how different my relationship would be with him, had he not gone through that himself, seen the things he has, possibly making him close up even more than his father already made him close up. How has Viet Nam affected me? Enough about politics for now, though, I guess. God bless America. On a side note, this morning I set up my first item to put up for sale on eBay. I'm pretty stoked about this, and hope to do it more often! G
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I've seen so many great concerts in my life. It's one of my hobbies, I guess. The first concert I saw was Ice House at the Kaukauna River Jam. I can't even remember the song they sang, not all too impressive. I think a year later, I saw the BoDeans at the same venue. That was the first of 6 or 7 times that I saw them. When I was in college, I saw M.C. Hammer. Twice no less! Vanilla Ice opened for him, this was right when "Ice Ice Baby" had hit number one. I laugh now, but at the time, that was the coolest thing. I've seen U2 5 times, Janet Jackson 3 times, Tori Amos 3 times and Elton John 4 times, once with Billy Joel. I've also seen Pink Floyd, Tracy Chapman, Richard Marx (again, cool at the time!), Huey Lewis And The News (again, cool at the time!), Sting, R.E.M., Prince (a dream come true), Sheryl Crow, Michelle Branch, Boyz II Men, Garbage, Ricky Martin (I'm such a sign of the times!), and Paul McCartney, which was one of those things that I can cross off of my list of things to do before I die. I'm sure there's others that I've seen too, that I just can't think of right now. My point is, I've seen a lot of concerts in my life, I love music. There's nothing better than a good live act. I've had quite a handful of amazing concert moments in my life already. In the picture above, my nephews are both wearing shirts that I bought for them when I was in Cleveland at the Rock And Roll Hall of Fame last summer. Once again, I went with Splash, who is as big a music buff as I am. He's the guy I want on my team for Rock and Roll Jeopardy. The Hall of Fame was an amazing trip. The coolest part of it was a special exhibit they had, featuring John Lennon's life, and work. On the very top floor of the John Lennon exhibit, they had a couple dozen of hand written lyrics to some of his best songs. To see the lyrics to "Imagine" written out in sloppy hand writing on old crinkled-up hotel stationary, really grounds a person, and makes them realize how human John Lennon is. They were playing the songs on speakers near the lyrics we were reading. When I started reading "Happy X-Mas (War Is Over)", the song synched up to it perfectly as I was reading it in my head. It was one of the coolest moments of my life. I remember swelling up in tears, getting goose bumps, and feeling John's presence. It was an amazing thing. Something only a music fan could really understand. That's all for now. I have a "cyber-date" with Heather in about 10 minutes (it's so hard for us to hook up anymore, that we have to schedule time to instant message!). I really just wanted to quickly talk about music tonight. Later. G
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Rebirth I've mentioned in a few posts, that a while back, she had a "divorce" party. It was to celebrate a new beginning, a new outlook on life. The picture you see on your left was the drawing on her invitation. It's a bit odd for me, putting somebody else's drawing on my website, but it was so inspirational to me...and it reflects many of the drawings I do myself. One of the things I've always liked about my site, is that all of the artwork are G-Man originals...but that's okay...It seems to fitting to have this piece on my site. I'm honored to have it here. I asked her what the drawing was about, and she said, originally, it was a portrait of God. It took about a year or so for her to realize though, that it was a self-portrait, and that we all have a divinity within ourselves. There are many spirals in the drawing. To her, spirals are symbolic of infinity. The title of the piece, "Rebirth," struck me. When I got the invitation, it was about Vicki and her new life. Never, in a million years, did I realize her party was going to be my rebirth as well. When the aura reader, Jeremy, did my reading, he drew my aura as a pent up little blackbird, encased in the shell of a human being. I've described my artistic rebirth as that of a phoenix, and I believe that before you can get a phoenix, you need ashes...and that's what my aura was. I look at Vick's drawing, and I see a phoenix of sorts as well. (On a side note, at Vicky's divorce party her roommate met Jeremy, and they are now dating. Another rebirth of sorts!) This past weekend in Madison just added fuel to my phoenix. Vicki got a new camera a few months ago, and showed me much of her work, which is amazing! She's a beginner, but an incredible natural talent. Being around her is so inspiring, that I've been shooting photos like crazy this past week as well. I realized that the past few years, along with my art, I've slowly been losing contact with my photography skills, on an artistic level. I'd forgotten how much I love the challenge of just me and my camera, and finding something interesting to shoot, giving it my own unique perspective. The things she shoots are so different than mine. She's more into leather and lace, I'm into flowers and sunsets...but we're able to talk endlessly about the craft, the passion, and the art. It's a cool thing rediscovering a talent that's been put away for awhile. It's even cooler, when you discover that a good friend has a talent you never knew of. Perhaps I'm going on too much about Vicki, but I felt she deserved some space on my website for all she's inspired me to be, knowingly or not. She and I lost contact for many years, and I feel so lucky to have gotten back into her life. Whenever I go back to Madison, it recharges me. It was great to be there this weekend. The reason I was there is that Vicki was having a benefit party. She's doing an AIDS ride across Wisconsin. Something like 600 miles over the course of a week. The party was quite successful, she raised lots of money. I was glad to be able to be there and help out. I stayed a day longer than I had planned, and we saw a fireworks display called "Rhythm and Booms" which was just fantastic. I got to spend a lot of time with Tracy, too, who seems to be really cool. I've never met a girl who's a bigger Beatles fan that I am! What a great way to start off my vacation! Tomorrow morning (well, actually this morning), I'm off to go up north to Lake Emily in Florence, WI, to my aunt and uncle's cottage. I have a couple pictures from their cottage on this site. It wouldn't be the 4th of July without spending some time on Lake Emily. Have a safe and happy 4th of July! G
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She had to be the most beautiful woman I've ever drawn. Her eyes shined in the light like I've never seen before, and she had the most beautiful neck and collar bone area that I've ever seen (I know that sounds weird....). She was one of those models that inspired the entire class; everybody was really into it, everybody really captured her likeness. It's cool that this model brought something unique to the class, and we were all able to give something back. I did three sketches of her that night, the first couple were short little warm-ups. Even on those, I was able to capture her essence immediately. With this last drawing, though, I got in a zone, and there was no stopping me. From beginning to end, this pose (which was about an hour and a half) just came to me so naturally. There was no struggle, no angst with this one. It was as if I was a tool for a higher power, being used to capture her delicate beauty. My drawing stying is slowly evolving, I can see it. My touch is getting more gentle when it needs to be, a little less linear. It's like I'm rediscovering how to capture an entire range of tones with just one pencil. The time that I was drawing this, although not a struggle, was quite intense, quite manic. I had an energy going, and inspiration going on, that was amazing. These are the moments I live for. This drawing of Jacqueline would have to be, in my humble opinion, a career best for me. Of course, I've been saying that with each new drawing that I post! It's so exciting, though, for me to feel a constant improvement each week or so, to see what I'm able to extract from myself, to see what I'm able to create out of nothing. In a lot of ways, it's like when I started running, and how each time I set my mind to it, I was able to go beyond the distance I had done the time before, to learn something from the time before, and improve on it. I honestly wonder what my full potential has to offer.... On a sort-of related note, the Tuesday before this drawing was done, the model didn't show up for class. About 4 or 5 us offered to pose for some short 30/40 minute poses. I was quite excited to pose, to see how the classmates would draw me. It was cool, because they all captured elements of me...from the shape of my head, the texture of my hair, the slouch of my pose. It was a cool experience sitting in front of the class like that, having them all stare at me so intensely, trying to find my essence, searching so deeply, with no judgement. I was so glad to be able to help out the class, and hope I can do it again sometime. Well, all for now. I have much more to talk about of the past few days, but that's sure to come. I think I'm going to go for a run. G P.S. If you haven't already, check out the photography section. I've updated it with about 6 or 7 new photos that I shot while Dad was gone to Canada. Along with my drawing, I can sense a real inspiration happening with my photography again too. How cool is that!? Also, be sure to check out the archive pages from last month and the months before. I hate closing the doors on those pages, but when one door closes, another one opens (thanks Vicki!). Anyway, they're still there, you just have to dig a little deeper.
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Watching The Wheels
Heart Don't Lie
American Gothic
If I Had A Million
Dollars
Another Brick
In The Wall
The Hands That
Built America
Rock On Wit Yo
Bad Self
July 4, 2003 (sketch
date unknown)
Full Potential